It’s War !

News of the redirection of impotent fury.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

A Note From the Demographic Party

As Kerry continues to slide in the polls even as Bush continues to be a dangerous raving lunatic, there is someone to blame: Ralph Nader!

As Kerry is yet unable to connect to people and John Edwards struggles to rediscover his alleged popularity, whose fault is that? Ralph Nader's!

As the nation becomes more disgusted each day with the war in Iraq, the economy, and Bush's lies about both, why can't Kerry overtake Bush in the polls? Ralph Nader!

As Demographs go all out to keep Nader off the ballots in every state possible, there's a very good reason we have to be as antidemocratic as the Repumlicans were in 2000 and 2002: Ralph Nader!

As Kerry goes face to face with Bush in the "debates," our supporters remain worried about one opponent who isn't allowed in: Ralph Nader!

When we lost both houses of Congress under Clinton, you know why: Ralph Nader!

When we supported every appointee and legislative effort Bush brought to us, when we voted to turn over the constitutional power of war to the president, we had to, because of: Ralph Nader!

When 150,000 Florida Demographs jumped ship and voted for Bush in 2000, costing Gore the election, what made them do it? Ralph Nader!

Why is it so hard for Kerry to differentiate himself from the Repugnican rival? Ralph Nader!

Join us in admiring Nader's work in the past but despising him now for running for office without the approval of both two major parties. Sign the letter below, and enclose as generous a check as you can afford when you send it back to Demographic headquarters.

Dear Ralph,

As a great admirer of your work in the past, I hate you. You embarrass me and I wish you would drop dead and get out of my life. I hated you for giving Bush the White House in 2000 and I hate you now for doing it again in 2004. You have so little support, you should face reality and drop out and save what little reputation you have left. Join me in supporting John Kerry for President and together we can change him. But first we have to show we support him without question. Or else, Kerry will lose and it will be your fault. You are one my heros. Don't ruin your legacy. Please. Kerry really isn't that bad. Now is not the time to think for yourself. It's us or them, and if you're not with us you're on the other team.

A Friend and True Liberal