Wind Power Blamed for Warmest Year on Record

A team of climate experts, writing in the latest issue of Silence magazine, have shown a strong correlation between the construction of large wind turbines and global warming.

Citing the announcement from NASA that 2005 was the warmest year in a century, the researchers also noted reports from the US and Europe that more large wind turbines were built in 2005 than ever before.

"Once you put the two stories side-by-side," said team leader Vyan Bedrick in a telephone interview, "the connection is obvious."

American wind industry spokesman Tammy Grayse denounced the peer-reviewed finding by insisting that wind turbine construction is a response to not a cause of global warming.

Watchdog group Free Wind, however, welcomed the Silence article, saying it proved what they have been saying for years. "Wind power is a sham," said Free Wind president Carn Stoppard. "The more we build, the more global warming continues. We are glad to see that the scientific community is starting to recognize this obvious fact."

Local "eco-entrepreneur" Stew Pratt dismissed the connection but was unable to provide reasons. "I'm busy saving the planet, asshole," he shouted while running to the other side of the street to take refuge in a bank.